Dating Someone Who Isn't Chinese: Communication and Safety
6 min read · 中文版
In Canada there are plenty of chances to meet people who aren't Chinese, and dating them is increasingly common. The basics of love are the same everywhere: sincerity, respect and saying what you mean. But a few things deserve special attention, especially one romance scam that impersonates foreigners.
First, know what you want
Do you want a serious relationship that leads to marriage, or to meet more people first? And what does the other person want? Being clear about relationship goals matters more than anything else.
Think about your family's view too. Some families are very open; some elders have concerns. Deciding in advance how to talk to your family is easier than handling it on the spot.
Communication: say it plainly, and check
Talking about feelings in English can sometimes miss a little of the meaning. Be direct about the important things, and it's fine to ask, "Did I understand you right?" A partner who learns a few words of Chinese, or your willingness to explain your family's customs, is a great start.
Daily habits and family values may differ a lot: how you celebrate holidays, how often you see your parents, how you handle money, where you'll live in future. You don't need to cover all of this at once, but talk it through before the relationship gets serious.
Beware the fake foreign officer or doctor scam
This common scam targets Chinese women in particular: the scammer uses stolen photos of a foreigner, claims to be an officer posted overseas, a UN doctor or an oil-rig engineer, quickly declares love, says they'll visit, and talks about marriage.
Then come the requests for money: customs fees on a "parcel" they sent, a frozen flight home that you need to pay for first, or an investment to make together. A real person can video-call you at any time; someone who can never video-call yet keeps asking for money is running a scam. Stop any payments right away, contact your bank, report it to the Canadian Anti-Fraud Centre (1-888-495-8501) and the police, and report the profile on the platform.
How to set it up on Huaren Love
If you're open to meeting people who aren't Chinese, switch on "Open to dating someone who isn't Chinese" in Settings. Your profile then says so, and members who aren't Chinese can find you with that Search filter; if you leave it off, you won't appear through that filter. You can switch it off at any time.
Whoever the other person is, chat and video-call on the site first, then meet in a public place.
Frequently asked questions
How can I tell whether someone I met online from abroad is a scammer?
Ask for a video call on the site: a real person can do it, while a scammer always has a reason not to. Declaring love quickly, saying they're stationed overseas or working on an offshore platform, and mentioning parcels, customs fees, flights or investments are all typical signs.
What if my parents don't approve of my non-Chinese partner?
First understand what your parents are worried about, then face it together: let them see your partner's sincerity and how serious you both are. Our guides on family pressure and meeting the parents may help.
Can members who aren't Chinese see me on Huaren Love?
Whether they can find you through the "Open to dating someone who isn't Chinese" filter is your choice: you appear in that filter only if you switch it on in Settings, and you can switch it off at any time.
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